FFA Optimize Anti-Flare, Pro-Bear Campaign

While activists everywhere are losing their minds over a Russian third division using a well-trained, clearly captivated bear to present the match day ball, FFA however, have gotten a few bright ideas.

Behind the scenes FFA are still working towards legalising flares but until the process is complete, they must continue to distribute their anti-flare message to the family friendly audience of the A-League. But, bears aren’t illegal, they thought.

Given the attention this video in Russia has received, FFA want to engage the angry audience and practice their favourite past time, any publicity is good publicity.


The A-League is set to see a world-first during this week’s elimination finals in Melbourne. Given both games will be played at AAMI Park over the weekend, the stadium has agreed to house a bear within the quarters for half time entertainment.

We understand the bear will be performing classic tricks like ‘Are you finishing those chips?’ and ‘You won’t mind if I take a bite or two out of that delicious burger?’.

What AAMI Park are really relying on though is the animal’s natural instincts kicking in when the seagulls arrive. AAMI Park have a new ‘Seagull Stew’ on their menu, which Melbourne Victory’s Members’ Pappou’s will cook. This stew is supposed to kill two birds with one stone (pun intended). Not only will they clear the pitch, they can also profit. However, they have a minor WWF issue capturing the birds. Alas the bear! The way they see it is, if the birds are killed amongst the natural cycle of life, they are in the clear of animal activists and able to produce their new product.


We for one are thrilled the FFA have decided to take a hands on approach in exciting spectators and creating a fun environment for all. Hold onto your picnic baskets!

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