Fowler with a howler


Some things were new – change of benches, Mauk’s bowl haircut, and Victory sitting in defence. But most things were old – Suncorp Stadium is still shit, Roar can’t score in 90, and Archie Thompson is terrible at his job. 

I am unsure why Brisbane came in as favourites to this game. The game against Glory introduced our new team and showed some improvement but ghosts of seasons past remained. Holding majority possession and doing nothing with it. Failing to push forward in critical moments. Only sudden bursts of energy in the dying minutes.  

Victory may have floundered in their first two games, but I would argue that was more to do with an on form Wanderers and cancel out football against City. Brisbane had only played one game and had a bye. It was going to be unpredictable and Victory countered that best – by sitting back in defence and saving themselves embarrassment. 

Brisbane however, were happy to be the jesters of Suncorp Stadium. Side note – seriously what is UP with that stadium? What has even been played there recently for the pitch to still look that bad?  Back on topic – Roarbie Fouler decided it would be grand to swap the benches and warm up areas. Why? Oh he has his reasons but isn’t going to tell you. Watching that post game interview continued my theme of the night = Old Nena (Baba or Grandmother) who wanted to pull everyone’s ear for being stupid.  

Victory established the early lead and played decent long passes and balls. Toivonen kicked things off in the 13th minute and then Brisbane were predictably punished in the 17th when Kasomba scored (offside) and then Nabbout corrected (onside). 1-0 down and were only 20 minutes in. 

Brisbane still had plenty of time and they just needed to work out a few kinks in the back and press forward. HA! How about no defence and more forward standing around flailing their aims instead of moving into positions that might be helpful to the guy with the ball. Honestly. I pictured my grandmother hopping down from her seat, slapping Fowler over the back of his head, and then dragging Mauk, O’Shea, and Inman by the ear into position. 

Why are you standing there flat footed with just your arms flailing? MOVE! I get you are currently unmarked but you are quickly going to get slide tackled because you think you can just stand there, get the ball, and pull off a miracle? Pretty sure GOD has cancelled out any miracles he could work by moving the benches away from The Den. 

Crocombe would get my Nena’s tick of approval for decent saves in the first half but don’t think this will distract me from asking WHERE IS JAMIE YOUNG?! Brisbane tried to press late in the first half (surprise surprise) but Victory held their defence and we went into the break. 

I could have slept through the second half if it wasn’t for my friends who don’t really care for football deciding to make terrible jokes. Mauk looking like Friar Tuck with his haircut, O’Toole acting like a tool (geddit?!) and yelling offside at every opportunity except when it was actually offside. Bless them for sitting through 90 minutes of Brisbane attempting terrible long balls straight to the Victory defence. 

In the 64th minute, O’Donovan shanked Brisbane’s best chance at goal and continued his curse of not converting against Victory. Victory had their best chance to go 2-0 up in the 77th minute but thanks to the post and some amazing theatrics from Neville, the result remained unchanged. These were the only highlights of an otherwise unremarkable second half. 

Victory got the result they wanted but probably played more cautious football than necessary. Kurz only fist pumped once which shows you that even he was disappointed they didn’t capitalise on their chances. Brisbane weren’t exactly putting up much of a challenge and my usual rage toward an underperforming team isn’t there. I feel such apathy toward this season that I will again be satisfied if Brisbane do not end up bottom of the table. Boy, what a tone to end on. Join me next week! 


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