Second half specialists win a game in the second half


What’s up bitterness, I’m back. 

It turns out Adelaide beat Melbourne teams and apparently only Melbourne teams in 2020. Brisbane’s a shitty city anyway, I mean it’s fucking hot all the time then January/February is suddenly monsoon season and their beach is in a tourist infested city area. Like, c’mon Brisbane, get a grip.

Yeah I’m bitter.

Adelaide travelled to The Sunshine State while the East Coast was suffering a much needed borderline Noah’s Ark situation. The rain was so intense in NSW that the Sydney Derby was postponed but Queensland was fine – fine enough to continue on with the game. 

The game was as Bozza would say, dogshit, up until the 58th minute. Do you want to know what happened in the first half? Two yellow cards. There were two yellow cards. Jacob Pepper in the 21st and Michael Jakobsen in the 42nd. That is literally all that happened. Although arguably Jordan Elsey probably should’ve gotten into trouble for studs into DWH’s thigh.

To the second half. Thankfully for everyone who sat through the first 45, we got some action. To be honest we got so much action in the 66th – 68th minute there was no need for much else. And yes that has two meanings from this Adelaide fan. Because that was the equaliser. Anyway lets start with the Adelaide goal shall we?

I was literally panicking about what in the hell I can write for my article because there was little attack from both teams but thankfully Ben Halloran scored a classic Benny goal. Halloran opens up the scoring in the 58th minute from an Aldred deflection and bangs it in the bottom left of the goal leaving no chance for Jamie Young.

I knew with every bone in my body that this 1-0 scoreline would not keep. Both teams are second half heavy and had come out of the sheds with more energy than me after an Espresso Martini. 

We waited only 10 minutes to see 20 year old substitute Mirza Muratovic fuck shit up. Not even a joke, let me put this sequence of play into dot points shall I;

  • McDonald tries across the face
  • Blocked
  • McDonald receives deflection and tries a shot
  • Blocked 
  • Calls for handball against Kitto 
  • Muratovic tries to tap it in
  • Blocked
  • Bowles sends ball back in
  • Izzo gets hands to it but couldn’t grip
  • Ball falls to Muratovic who finds the back of the net

In the most classic A-League scramble, Brisbane find their equaliser. I’m guessing the VAR didn’t look at the handball shouts because there was a goal?? I don’t know the rules anymore so don’t ask me.

Amongst all of this, Corey Brown collides with the goal post and breaks a nail. A toenail might I add. According to our expert sideline reporter, Kianna, Corey Brown took off his shoes and socks and pulled off a toenail. We then had the pleasure of this footage doing the rounds on Twitter. Kianna with the hard hitting journalism asked Corey post-match and he did in fact confirm “yeah it’s all completely gone off” In what is the most surprising intel from this exchange with Kianna is he did not say ‘yeah nah’. Thrilling stuff.

In a Brisbane Roar first in the 74th minute, El Capitano Tom Aldred bangs in his first Brisbane Roar goal which eventuated from a short corner. I can’t even. Honestly Adelaide, conceding to a short corner? Pull your finger out. After a bit of here and there from the corner, the ball finds its way to Scott McDonald who sends it over to Aldred on the back post to head it in. What sucks for Adelaide is there were two men on the back post. We were just too aerially challenged.

Adelaide did not look like they were getting back in this but they had some positivity in what was a dire performance from them. In the 82nd minute 15 year old Mohamed Toure made his Reds debut. Younger brother of currently injured Al Hassan, many have very high expectations for the kid. And he did not disappoint. In the short period of time he was on for, he was quick, getting into good spaces and happy to go in for a challenge. A very exciting prospect for Adelaide as they continue to invest in local youth.

We sat through an additional 5 minutes of stoppage time and Adelaide and Brisbane fans everywhere were pretty done with the game and were happy for the whistle to blow. As much as the energy continued until the final whistle, Adelaide just couldn’t compose themselves. They were just making silly plays and were easily pissed off, especially Jakobsen. The ref blows the whistle and Brisbane Roar take the 3 points.

Adelaide United now get to go back home to a dry and hot shithole to face the Mariners at home on Valentines Day. Brisbane Roar have something a little less sexy and head to Mars to face Western United on Sunday.

That’s me done.

By Rose Valente

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